At Sideburns and Cigarettes, we welcome all feedback! Be forewarned: Responses, should they come at all, can, will, and damn it should vary depending on who is contacted, when they read it, and how much they already hate you.

Sideburns will be happy to respond to any e-mails you send him provided he has the time. This is a fairly amazing thing, due to the fact that Sideburns believes e-mail is responsible for a great deal of the degradation of the English language.

Sideburns can be contacted at sideburns@sideburnsandcigarettes.com.

Cigarettes loves e-mails because they are an agent of progress and chaos at the same time. He simply hates the people who send them.

Cigarettes can be contacted at cigarettes@sideburnsandcigarettes.com.